a huge blow to the ego

Posted: July 7, 2008 in Family
Tags: , , ,

So we’re checking out at Walmart yesterday and I received one of the worst implied insults a 30-year old man can get…

Of course, I was already not in the best of moods just by the mere fact that I was in Walmart on a Sunday afternoon with three stir-crazy kids instead of at home quietly drooling on my sofa. We had been searching the entire store for items to go in our Operation Christmas Child boxes (our church finally wised up and realized people would do more boxes if we didn’t try to do these during Christmas). I had just finished making my oldest son return a toy he had picked up and started playing with during the course of shopping. When I asked him to return it, he wanted to put it down right where we were. While picking up my youngest son’s flip flops that has just fallen on the floor for the 13th time, I gently explained that electronic quiz toys don’t go in the toilet seat section and if he left it there someone else would have to put it in its right place. He cried. Not because I was harsh or he was sorry, but because he didn’t want to go by himself. My wife was returning from the bathroom with my daughter. Ok, lets get the heck outta here.

You never see these things coming.

I dump the contents of our shoeboxes on the conveyor belt and about halfway through ringing us up, the check-out lady looks at my wife Tiffany and goes, “girl, at first I thought you were his daughter but then I took a second look and I guess not.” You guess not? Gee, thanks for revisiting the question. You wouldn’t want to say anything dumb.

Believe it or not, I had nothing to say. I know I married over my head. As a matter if fact, I’m proud of it. Tiff is only a year and half younger than me and while I’m quite average, she is very much not. And I figured when I was 50 or so I might get a few comments like this from half-blind old ladies. But at age 30? Tiff consoled me and reminded me that I had to consider the source. True. I did consider doing many bad things to her.

In any event, it has become clear to me that I’m going to have to do something about this. Start working out? Start watching what I eat? Throw acid on Tiff’s face? Nah. I’m thinking I just won’t ever go to Walmart again…

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Comments
  1. tracey says:

    Hey,
    I think this might make you feel better… you know Rob is 10 years older than me right? Well in 25 years of marriage I’ve never had anyone (nor has Rob to my knowledge), give me a comment like that. So what does that mean? Either Rob looks young for his age or I need to see a plastic surgeon!
    Love ya,
    Tracey

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